Neutered Vegas (day 3)

It's Friday morning, Oct. 9, and I'm awake before 8 a.m., time to venture out into the parking lot. 

Twenty years ago I learned about the high tech game of hide-and-seek: Geocaching. I wrote about it for my newspaper chain, and spent a little time the next several years searching for hidden containers of trinkets and crap in public parks and other places. During that era of my life I found a few hidden caches at point along the strip. It's a fun, family-friendly activity that I stopped making time for years ago. 

And then I wound up babysitting my nieces during the past several months. Before long I was introducing them to geocaching. 

Knowing there was a geocache in the parking lot of the Orleans, I ventured out shortly after the sun had risen to find a small, hidden metal tin using GPS coordinates, take a few pictures and ponder all the things I'll never experience in Vegas as a resident of Minnesota. I spent a few minutes in the parking lot that morning watching cars cruising Tropicana Avenue in both directions, regretting I didn't snap a picture of the colorful woman who was walking down the sidewalk, probably not for exercise, and considering how my life might have been different had I made different choices at points in my life. More on that another day. 

My parking lot view of the hotel where I've spent the most nights during the past 10 years.

After my short parking lot excursion, I took coffee up to the room, we relaxed for a while, snacked on breakfast bars we brought with us and decided our lunch would be at In-N-Out. My trips often end with lunch at In-N-Out before heading to the airport, and usually at the Maryland Parkway location near the Pinball Hall of Fame. This trip would have a morning departure, so our In-N-Out visit came early, and we opted for the location down the street since we wouldn't be dining in the restaurant. We used the drive-thru, which took about 20 minutes, then dined at the outdoor table outside the gift shop next door. 

The long wait for a burger and fries.

Then it was back to Orleans and a visit to the pool. We spent a long afternoon at the pool, which again wasn't very busy, although it seemed like a lot of the pool visitors came later that afternoon. Once again there were announcements telling us to wear our mask, and for whatever reason, one of the poolboys made a pass around the pool deck during the late afternoon telling everyone not wearing a mask while lounging to wear their mask. But it's not as if the mask police were pounding the pavement all afternoon. 

We left the pool late in the afternoon and cleaned up before heading north. Our first destination: Broadacres Marketplace. 

Broadacres Marketplace is a huge outdoor flea market. I'm a sucker for flea markets, although I often have a tough time parting with my cash when I visit one. My buddy, who is a master at scooping up old video game cartridges in bulk and selling off his purchase game by game for a nice profit, had been to Broadacres once upon a time, and vouched for it as being a good flea market. 

It's a couple of miles north of downtown, and it's huge. Huge. HUGE. It's a couple of bucks to get in, and they have security doing metal detection when you enter, which didn't exactly comfort my girlfriend. 

The flea market runs Friday evenings and weekends. There are many food vendors scattered about the market grounds, and there are tables and a stage area where they feature live music during less pandemic times. There also appears to be a small variety of simple amusement park rides on the grounds to help entertain the kids, but those were all shut down on this Friday night. 

I wondered if some of the vendors have semi-permanent set ups at this flea market. Plenty didn't, without question. Despite opening at 4 p.m., we were there at 6 p.m. and some vendors were still setting up, including the one vendor I found that had an extensive collection of Halloween merchandise. Their entire space seemed dedicated to Halloween merch, but they weren't ready to begin selling when I walked by. I thought I'd come back later, but forgot about them before we left. 

The layout of booths is organized, but it's hard to keep track of where to go, or where you've been. It's not a basic rectangle of shopping aisles. And as I noted, it's huge. Huge. HUGE. 

As for the merchandise. I was both amazed and disappointed. 

There were booths that had odd collections of random secondhand crap, which is what I like to see at a flea market. And there were plenty of dealers selling new merchandise, as I expected. 

There were plenty of vendors selling household products you'd find at your local grocery store, such as laundry soap and toilet paper. I didn't price compare the bargains to be had. I don't recall seeing Tide laundry detergent, but there was plenty of less prestigious brands. I couldn't help but wonder, who comes to the flea market to buy their plastic sandwich bags or aluminum foil? Can it really be that much cheaper than the generic products at local stores around Vegas? 

Need $5 leggings? I don't, but I saw at least a dozen vendors with big displays of leggings, some noting their product was $5. If you're looking for cheap leggings, I guess you eye them up and assume they'll fit to your liking. The vendors don't have fitting rooms, that I could tell, and I'm guessing they aren't in the business of making exchanges, a la your local Target store.

I saw a few vendors with lingerie prominently on display, as well. I also multiple vendors with socks and tighty-whities, but those weren't displayed as prominently, for some reason. Plenty of new women's and children's shoes to be had, and a few men's sneakers, I believe. I only recall one vendor selling new cowboy boots. But dang, that booth had a ton of them, and I think they were all $50 a pair. I can't imagine they were high quality, and I'm guessing boots in your size are hit and miss.

If you need bright yellow or orange clothing for wearing at a construction site, several vendors at the flea market had you covered. 

Bulk candy and/or nuts, you could find that several times over. A lot of those products seemed to be things you'd more commonly find in a Mexican market. 

Several vendors had toys, although it didn't appear many of the toys were name brand products. There were some, I believe, but I sensed that a lot of the toys were generic versions of known commodities, like Disney princess dolls. I saw a smattering of dealers selling Funko Pops, but I didn't bother looking at what they had or what they were asking for their inventory. I don't collect them, and I have no idea which ones are "valuable." 

The oddest things I found were tires, mattresses and appliances. 

I didn't see many vendors selling tires, maybe only one, but I had to wonder who buys a set of tires from a random vendor at a flea market? 

Several vendors had mattresses. How does a person decide they're going to buy mattresses in bulk and resell them through a flea market? And how much can you make selling them? 

And appliances! There were a few vendors with washers and dryers. So weird!

hI was disappointed that I didn't find many vendors selling collectibles or outdated media. I don't collect comic books any more. I haven't for decades. But I always enjoy checking out books for sale, and buy some cheap old books for reading and passing along, often via a Little Free Library. 

Same with baseball cards or other sports collectibles. I get a kick out of looking at the stuff, but rarely see anything I'm even tempted to buy, unless I think I can easily turn around and sell it on eBay for a healthy product, and most vendors know what the going rate is for such merch. 

I found one vendor with old video games, but I don't play them, I don't collect them and I have no idea what any of them are worth, so I wouldn't know a bargain if I saw it. I was surprised not to see many DVDs, CDs or other media for sale. Many of us don't want that stuff any more, but I'll buy a cheap CD if it interests me, although I don't have the patience to search through an unorganized collection looking for the diamond in the rough.  

More than anything, I'd love to know the stories behind these vendors. Where do they source mattresses, leggings, bulk candy and generic toys? How much do they earn after a weekend at Broadacres? Why is the flea market business appealing to them? 

I know we missed an aisle or two of vendors, but I didn't want to spend two hours looking at merchandise I wasn't going to buy. I had given up hope of finding vendors with merchandise that interested me, so after about an hour it was time to head for the car. 

My picture at the start of our flea market adventure doesn't
give you a good idea of how expansive Broadacres Marketplace is.
And I didn't stop to take pics of all the odd merchandise I found at this flea market. 

I'd love to have a chance to go back some day, by myself, and scrutinize the merchandise for a couple of hours. My girlfriend politely tagged along, but she'd gladly stay at the hotel on a Saturday and allow me to scour the merch all morning. 

From Broadacres we headed downtown for dinner at Chicago Brewing Company inside Four Queens.

Friday night downtown during a pandemic. You wouldn't know it. Like many have reported, plenty of people are rolling in on the weekends. Fremont Street was crowded, and although they're not doing temperature checks outside the casinos, they still have gates funneling you into and out of areas. Not sure why that makes sense when social distancing is preached everywhere we go. 

Dinner at Chicago Brewing was good, but we had to tolerate three jackasses who were drunk, watching NBA basketball and yelling every time they got a little tingly in their pants. I've been emotionally invested in televised sports, but Chicago Brewing ain't a sports bar. The waiter working the room told the dudes, more than once, that they needed to dial it down, and the second time he did, one of the dudes got belligerent. Dudes should have been kicked out. They were done eating, and one of the dudes was practically passed out on the table for a while. And yet, when it appeared they were going to pay their tab and leave, the waiter ends up bringing three more beers. Made no sense to me. 

After dinner we went to the Plaza to play. I finally sat down to play Ultimate Texas Hold 'Em, and had no luck. My girlfriend had no luck on the slots, either. After an hour or so we headed back to the Orleans, where I played cards again, with no luck. It wasn't a late night for me, and it wasn't an exciting night of gambling in Vegas, but it was a great day in Vegas nonetheless.

Book review: 14 things to do in Vegas before you die

Among the things given to us when we checked in at Tahiti Village last October was a sheet listing 100 things to do in Vegas.

I didn't inspect it closely, but I kept it, thinking I would critique it at some point via this blog. Instead I threw it away. 

Now I'm curious to know what that list contained, and if it was as bizarre as the 100 things listed in a 2016 book, "100 Things to do in Las Vegas Before You Die."

I was perusing my local library's Vegas book collection not so long ago and found the book. It is written by two former writers for the Las Vegas Review-Journal. You'd expect it would have great details and great local perspective. Well, not so much. 

The book's preface notes that it lists "bucket list" items for both the tourist and the Vegas area resident. Many of the items aren't worthy of any such list, regardless of your residency status. There are some interesting, obvious and bizarre suggestions in the book, and here's a sampling of what you'll find in the book. I'll leave it to you to decide which entries are interesting, obvious or bizarre. 

• The book has a list of craft breweries and places to find craft beers, both in the touristy areas and in the suburbs. I'm not sure going to a craft brewery in Henderson really needs to be on a bucket list, but for the uninitiated, the book gives you a clue that you can sample local, small batch beer at a few casino properties.
• Enjoying a meal "al fresco" warrants an entry, and offers three suggestions of places to eat outdoors. You haven't lived until you've eaten an outdoor meal at Paris Las Vegas.
• If you want to drink or dine at a "Vegas dive," there are a few suggestions, although the book doesn't tell you why you should visit Frankie's Tiki Room. Hint: Don't go there for the veal.
• I had no idea there were wineries in Pahrump, but if I die tomorrow, I don't think not having visited one will be near the top of my regret list.
• I'm not sure why tasting boba tea in Vegas is critical for tourists or residents, but a place called Cafe Teaze has servers who wear lingerie. Suddenly I'm interested in trying boba tea, otherwise known as bubble tea, as best as I can tell. I couldn't believe I hadn't heard of this before. I had to look up this place to learn more about it. Located in Chinatown, it changed its name to Milk Teaze at some point, evidently, and a Facebook page for the business notes that as of late January the location has closed due to a lease issue. But the owners promise to find a new location.
• An eclair at Jerry's Nugget gets an entry, although nowhere is it mentioned that this should be the last item you knock off your bucket list, for safety reasons.
• Three happy hours are worthy of mentioning on a page dedicated to the topic. Perhaps they should have limited the book to 99 things.
• Celebrating Oktoberfest in Vegas is a must-do, so they say. Yes, make sure to experience a knock off of the German celebration at Hofbrauhaus, by all means.
• White Castle at Casino Royale makes the list. Of all the chains that aren't called McDonald's, White Castle is the one to highlight? A "tip" at the bottom of the page, which is found on a bunch of the entries, mentions a few other chains you can find, including In-n-Out.
• Two entries are set aside for gambling and exploring the strip. Do we really need bucket list items for such general activities that are a lot of the reason people come to Vegas in the first place?
• Glorifying an EDM DJ at an expensive nightclub makes the book's list of things to do in Vegas. If I live another 50 years my life will be incomplete when I die.
• I haven't lived unless I've experienced the National Finals Rodeo, allegedly.
• Going to a concert, at places such as Bunkhouse Saloon, Brooklyn Bowl and The Pearl is unlike anything you'll ever experience in Milwaukee. The "go to a concert" page does note two festivals that take place annually, although it tells you nothing about why you should go to all the trouble to attend Life is Beautiful.
• I had no idea that I could discover a desert oasis at Wetlands Park. I can't recall seeing any chatter or discussion about this county park, where you can ride your bike, allegedly. I'm curious to learn more about this park, wherever it is.
• You can pick your own produce at Gilcrease Orchard in North Las Vegas. You haven't lived until you've picked apples from a spring-fed orchard in the desert.
• It turns out there are at least three parks in the area that have ponds stocked with fish. Catch a catfish from a stocked pond in Vegas before you die!
• For some reason geocaching in Vegas is worthy of your bucket list. If you don't know what this is, it's a high-tech game of hide-and-seek. It's a great hobby that can be fun for the family, and can be a great way to discover and explore parks and other public areas near and far. I use to spend time enjoying the activity, and have done it in Vegas during a few trips. Some people like to do a little geocaching everywhere they travel, and I've done my share of it in multiple states while on vacations in the past, but I'd say skip going to the trouble of doing it in Vegas unless you've tried it at home first, are hooked on it and can't take a vacation from it.
• There are three places to shoot a machine gun, or other firearms, the book reminds us, including AR-15s. I'm gonna guess a new printing of the book would include an edit of this page. 
• You haven't lived until you have signed up for slot clubs at Vegas casinos.
• Dancing in a casino lounge: Gotta do it!
• You must savor an artisan cocktail in Vegas. You must. While four places to do so are noted, including The Cosmopolitan, nowhere does it note one of the most unusual cocktails you'll ever discover, the Verbena at Cosmo's Chandelier bar.
• Witnessing a wedding, if not having your own, in Vegas is essential. I've never been to a Vegas wedding. What am I to do? According to the book, I can hang out at the wedding license bureau to see if there's a couple looking for a witness.
• There's a Martin Luther King Jr. statue in North Las Vegas. It's in a historically significant area, I'm told, but I'd argue that visiting Ebenezer Baptist Church in Atlanta, where King once preached, and is now maintained as a national park, might be a better way to honor his memory.
• Almost every review I've read says that Gold & Silver Pawn, famous thanks to the "Pawn Stars" TV show, is not worth the effort to visit. The authors think you need to go there before you die.
• Somehow a nail spa that does fancy nail art makes the Vegas 100 bucket list. How much did Scratch Nail Spa in Henderson pay to be included in the book?
• You gotta "drop some cash at the finest stores around." Until you do, you haven't lived.
• For some reason you need to visit one of four record stores listed in the book, if record collecting is your thing. Why not list comic book and toy stores as two more items when you start running out of ideas?
• If I had to judge the quality of this book based upon one thing, I'd base it upon how well it touts the Pinball Hall of Fame. As a devout pinball enthusiast who knows a decent amount about the place, I could tell you more than you'd want to know, unless you're a pinhead like me. As for the book, its summation of the hall of fame is lackluster. It gives you a basic description of the place, noting that there are machines from the 1950s through the 1990s, and cites a few machine themes. I'm not sure where their info came from, but it's a rather sloppy entry that could have done a far better job of detailing what you'll find. But the tip at the bottom of the page notes you can peruse the interior of it via Google Maps. The images are outdated, as many machines have been moved around, but it gives you a good idea, and a great view of a bunch of the machines you can find in there today.

The book is a compilation of information, some of which is outdated, naturally, thanks to the nature of Vegas. It has some good information about things that would be of interest to Vegas rookies as well as transplants who haven't had a chance to explore the greater Vegas area, but not enough to make it worth the $16 cover price.

The book falls short in a several ways. It gives you addresses for many places, but doesn't tell you where they are in relation to anything else, with limited exceptions. Sometimes it's obvious a business is in a casino, sometimes it's obvious a location is outside of the tourist districts, but plenty of times it's not very clear.

There are driving directions, and time estimates, for a few of the destinations noted in the book, such as ghost towns, but nowhere does it suggest which items are best suited for locals or which places are reasonably accessible for tourists who don't have their own vehicle to get around.

While prices are subject to change, there's rarely a hint of what it might cost to see a museum or attend a festival. Yes, I can do my own research, and that's what this book seems to expect me to do. I get it, it's not a visitor's guide with excruciating detail, but it has so little information about anything it references that it serves as little more than a book of ideas, ideas you can find on websites galore.

The book's title leads you to believe that it's a great resource full of great ideas, but it falls short on both counts.